I am grateful to all the participants who described their state and to those who have even already completed the practice. I read everyone’s accounts and found important points that were relevant to me and shared by me and my loved ones. As a rule, people rarely discuss such topics, or they judge them: good, bad—but they do not try to improve their state and sometimes simply accept it as given.
Fortunately, I have no problems falling asleep, waking during the night, panic attacks, bad dreams, or what seems to be a need to control life. I would like to learn to fall asleep on my back, rather than only on my side. Perhaps I think I can relax if I want to, but I could go deeper—so deep that I forget about my body in everyday life and can quickly shift my attention between different areas (scanning the state of my body and muscle tone).
The practice might be useful when sleeping at night in a new, unfamiliar place.
In my case, anxiety manifests itself as a constant desire to crack my joints (and the cracking in all my joints is bothersome, even though there is no pain; it does not go away after physical exercise or movement). I have a rounded back and connective-tissue dysplasia. It also manifests in touching and scratching my face or other parts of my body—in other words, I find it difficult to sit still without doing anything unnecessary, touching objects, or playing with the hand expander. The area that bothers me most is the back of my neck. I notice that I strain my eyes more than necessary. I practice yoga; for example, there is tension in my facial muscles and a tendency to pull my head forward. Cold extremities are also distracting. If I sit in one place for a long time, it then becomes difficult to decide to switch to something else, such as going for a walk.
It would be interesting to try the practice in this situation, when there is little energy and I need to switch to another activity.
Stress increases when I do not resolve my everyday problems, or when I do things at the wrong time—things that I should do and that, based on my past experience, have caused me suffering before; in other words, I keep making the same mistakes. For example, I deliberately disrupt my daily routine or eat the wrong things and/or the wrong amounts. At the same time, I feel anxious inside, want to finish as quickly as possible, feel that what is happening is wrong, feel that I am contaminating myself and going against God, harming my soul. This leads to a bad mood that remains the next day, and the state sometimes drags on. The feeling of novelty and joy in life disappears, as does faith in yourself—the feeling that you can change anything if you wish and learn something new. There is great inertia when trying to get out of such states.
Sometimes I feel helpless when I see that my loved ones and the people around me also prefer to do nothing, and like to complain, criticize, and discuss other people. They do not change; they behave and react to events around them predictably, and new information simply goes in one ear and out the other. I realize that I have not gone far beyond them, and I know that I need to start with myself—it is not my place to teach or raise my elders. Naturally, if I have hurt someone through my behavior or actions, I cannot simply forget about it. I have a desire to teach others, and I notice their shortcomings. But it is difficult to sort myself out, see myself objectively, and change in myself what I do not like, what gets in the way, and what has been taking away my life resources for many years.
Sometimes everything seems to be going well and peacefully from the outside, or there are no particular events, but there is still anxiety inside. I would also recommend deep-level relaxation practice to my loved ones.
Certain patterns of bodily behavior have accumulated in my interactions with the people around me. This is expressed in facial expressions, sometimes unconscious tension in the muscles of my face and neck, gestures, posture, and so on. I often look away, for example. In general, I do not know how to resolve conflicts properly: I cling to my position and do not listen to reasonable arguments, especially under pressure to make a quick decision in an oppressive atmosphere involving swearing and so on. I also do not want to provoke negative emotions in my opponents. The practice would be very useful to me in this situation.
Fortunately, I have no problems falling asleep, waking during the night, panic attacks, bad dreams, or what seems to be a need to control life. I would like to learn to fall asleep on my back, rather than only on my side. Perhaps I think I can relax if I want to, but I could go deeper—so deep that I forget about my body in everyday life and can quickly shift my attention between different areas (scanning the state of my body and muscle tone).
The practice might be useful when sleeping at night in a new, unfamiliar place.
In my case, anxiety manifests itself as a constant desire to crack my joints (and the cracking in all my joints is bothersome, even though there is no pain; it does not go away after physical exercise or movement). I have a rounded back and connective-tissue dysplasia. It also manifests in touching and scratching my face or other parts of my body—in other words, I find it difficult to sit still without doing anything unnecessary, touching objects, or playing with the hand expander. The area that bothers me most is the back of my neck. I notice that I strain my eyes more than necessary. I practice yoga; for example, there is tension in my facial muscles and a tendency to pull my head forward. Cold extremities are also distracting. If I sit in one place for a long time, it then becomes difficult to decide to switch to something else, such as going for a walk.
It would be interesting to try the practice in this situation, when there is little energy and I need to switch to another activity.
Stress increases when I do not resolve my everyday problems, or when I do things at the wrong time—things that I should do and that, based on my past experience, have caused me suffering before; in other words, I keep making the same mistakes. For example, I deliberately disrupt my daily routine or eat the wrong things and/or the wrong amounts. At the same time, I feel anxious inside, want to finish as quickly as possible, feel that what is happening is wrong, feel that I am contaminating myself and going against God, harming my soul. This leads to a bad mood that remains the next day, and the state sometimes drags on. The feeling of novelty and joy in life disappears, as does faith in yourself—the feeling that you can change anything if you wish and learn something new. There is great inertia when trying to get out of such states.
Sometimes I feel helpless when I see that my loved ones and the people around me also prefer to do nothing, and like to complain, criticize, and discuss other people. They do not change; they behave and react to events around them predictably, and new information simply goes in one ear and out the other. I realize that I have not gone far beyond them, and I know that I need to start with myself—it is not my place to teach or raise my elders. Naturally, if I have hurt someone through my behavior or actions, I cannot simply forget about it. I have a desire to teach others, and I notice their shortcomings. But it is difficult to sort myself out, see myself objectively, and change in myself what I do not like, what gets in the way, and what has been taking away my life resources for many years.
Sometimes everything seems to be going well and peacefully from the outside, or there are no particular events, but there is still anxiety inside. I would also recommend deep-level relaxation practice to my loved ones.
Certain patterns of bodily behavior have accumulated in my interactions with the people around me. This is expressed in facial expressions, sometimes unconscious tension in the muscles of my face and neck, gestures, posture, and so on. I often look away, for example. In general, I do not know how to resolve conflicts properly: I cling to my position and do not listen to reasonable arguments, especially under pressure to make a quick decision in an oppressive atmosphere involving swearing and so on. I also do not want to provoke negative emotions in my opponents. The practice would be very useful to me in this situation.